rhyme & reason

Most people who know I’m headed to the southern-most continent on the globe have asked the inevitable question, “why.” I’m somewhat embarrassed to say that I don’t have a good rational reason.

The tall-sized response is: “It’s an opportunity to have an amazing working adventure trip.”

The grande-sized answer: I suppose much of my motivation is to experience some change in my life. In 5 years, I have seen many of my family members and friends move to a variety of places from California to Massachusetts. Since visiting Matt in Cameroon, I have experienced an incessant need for travel. Watching my family and friends take opportunities to Europe, Asia, and elsewhere, while I was unable to participate, only fed the fire. Another factor is my frustration with the self-centered-ness I continue watching in western society, where the “me, me, me” attitude is demolishing the infrastructure of our cohesive “United” States. I know I have my moments of self-indulgence, as well (in fact, this might be a selfish move in itself to extract myself from the egocentric society I’ve grown tired of), but this may be a way to run away from the attention-grabbing, media-hungry breaking-news society we regularly participate in. Some may also say I am rebelling a bit against what is expected of me in terms of being a single woman in society; that I am defying the ridiculous notion that I MUST actively and continually pursue becoming a married woman with 2.5 kids, a minivan, and a house in the suburbs by age 30 (or even 35) to become “successful”. Whatever the root of the reason, I have tossed off what the world considers valuable in the means of possessions (tangible & others) and career, and forced myself to proceed on a bit of faith that God will provide what I need. In one sense, this change has nothing to do with me and my familiar comforts, and in another, it has everything to say about who I am as I step into a new adventure.

I would like to tell my Christian friends that I have poured hours of endless prayer into this decision to fly the coop and head south, but, it wasn’t like that. Yes, I prayed that God would use me in my life for His Purpose, and I pray now for who I will be, and what I will be a part of, and how I represent myself to others, but, at the point of decision, an opportunity presented itself and I took it. I do trust that God gave me this opportunity, has a purpose, and sent me the next step in His Plan in the form of an e-mail from Pete at Raytheon Polar Services. Pastor Fred told me on Sunday: “God will go with you.” I rest comfortable in that knowledge. An amazing amount of peace flooded over me with those words!

If you want the venti-sized answer, you’ll have to sit down with me for a couple hours over coffee at Starbucks and talk through dozens of life circumstances and stories. I’ll spare you those long paragraphs! But, know, that wherever this posting finds you, God is with you wherever you go, too.