rental return

Sometime in the night, the rain stopped and although the morning was clouded over, I was able to pack up my backpack outside with a bit more ease than being crammed in the car.

I exited to see the Royal National Park and took a short 1/2 hour hike at Wattamolla. The weather appeared to be moving in again, so I hopped back in the car and arrived at the airport at 9:30am. It wasn't worth it for me to have the rental and entire extra day for four extra hours I would use it, so I figured I could catch up on some reading and writing in the airport.

It was a good trip and the driving kept me occupied, but also gave me a good deal of thinking time. I learned how to be " me" again and appreciate my independence. I think I lost some of that around such a close group of people in Antarctica.

I saw God's creation in a different part of the world; alive and functioning, even with the number of non-native species introduced to Australia and New Zealand. I enjoyed this Creation of His!

At the airport, I enjoyed a casual day reading, downloading pictures, and relaxing with my grande almond mocha (I even had them use whole milk and whipped cream)! I met four other people from The Ice ready to board the Sydney to Honolulu flight: Fuelie Shannon, GA Ben, and DA's Dale & Katie. I laughed a lot at the fact that we keep running into each other even a month off the frozen continent!

It just hit me in the last day that I am returning to The States. Even though I am first in Hawaii, I can restart my phone plan and not deal with customs after this flight (well, until I get to Canada). I'm not sure I am ready to be in the Northern Hemisphere after six months beneath the equator, but all things in their time, I suppose. First, 9.5 hours to Honolulu.

And, so despite the rain, I am glad I came to Australia, and will head to Hawaii with a little trepidation about ending my time overseas. It's been nearly six months and I can't say I've missed my of the American rat-race, but I do look forward to some of the comforts of being in my North American "home" countries.

australian arrangements

I flew to Sydney today. I was thrilled to fly over the city, complete with Sydney Harbor Bridge, the Sydney Opera House, and the amazing waterways as we descended into the airport. I have arrived at a backpackers I’d rather not be at, but will only stay here tonight, a better place tomorrow, and head out of town for the rest of the week.

After I checked in, I spent a few hours running through the Royal Botanical Gardens. I listened to the "mine, mine, mine" birds (from Finding Nemo) and I ran along the water with an impressive view of the Sydney Bridge and the Sydney Opera House. I find it a bit incredulous to stand here; in a place I never intended to actually visit. While it is very easy to take advantage of my post-Ice opportunities, I was reminded to embrace the special moments; like the beautiful views, the people, and the places I will yet see. Since my run, it started raining, keeping me indoors for awhile.

Tomorrow is the 75 birthday of the Bridge. I hope to get a chance to walk across the expanse with some 300,000 other people. I am also intending to meet Tom from The Ice in the evening. I have a car reserved for Monday afternoon and hope to see some of the mountains, ocean, and if I am an audacious driver, perhaps even a bit of the real "outback." Next Sunday, I'll be States-bound (but only as far as Hawaii).

I’m grateful to be here. I certainly give credit for God’s providence in finding me here. I just finished C.S. Lewis’ Surprised by Joy which gave me some insight into traveling in regards to the journey I’m on (not only in the Southern Hemisphere, but more directly related to the road of life I am on). I draw from the following paragraph that life is a joy (or joy in progress). All of it; the pain and the happiness, dull and acute, because I am on the road to see Christ:

"But what, in conclusion, of Joy?...
It was valuable only as a pointer to something other and outer…When we are lost in the woods the sight of a signpost is a great matter. He who first sees it cries, ‘Look!’ The whole party gathers round and stares. But, when we have found the road and are passing signposts every few miles, we shall not stop and stare. They will encourage us and we shall be grateful to the authority that set them up. But we shall not stop and stare, or not much; not on this road, though their pillars are of silver and their lettering of gold. ‘We would be at Jerusalem.’ Not, of course, that I don’t often catch myself stopping to stare at roadside objects of less importance.”

last night in antarctica

I’m sitting in the galley. The sun is setting. My bags are checked. My room is clean. My boxes are stored. I’m leaving on a cargo plane tomorrow! I can hardly believe that my time in Antarctica is coming to a close.

Staying until the last flight has been wonderful. The food is better, the lines are gone, there is no worries about having delicates thrown in the dryer, I watched Williams Field Ice Runway come down, and I saw buildings close up and people say ‘goodbye.’ The last few days have been a bit lonely, but we have kept quite busy with work until this afternoon.

Tomorrow, we are scheduled to depart McMurdo around 11:30 and fly off of the Pegasus White Ice Runway at 15:00. I checked in (we do that a day in advance here) with my bags today and out of the 75 pounds of checked luggage we are allowed to bring home, I’m down to 56 pounds! Never mind that my carry on is nearly 50 pounds as well!

So, I have had my last supper, my last shower, finished the last of my laundry, packed my last boxes, and I’m headed out on the last flight in about 18 hours! My time in Antarctica is nearly up and one might ask what has happened to me in that time. People keep saying that I’ll return a different person. I disagree. I am very much the same person who left Illinois on October 4. I have new life experiences and a wide variety of perspectives to add to my mind full of ideas and beliefs. I have been disheartened by cultural and spiritual relativism but I have felt the ecstatic joy of the mountains and the hills giving glorious admiration to their Creator. I have been chilled by the wind and snow, and warmed by the endearing friends I gained. I felt sadness when missing events in North America, but elated to experience a new series of tales to tell them when I return. I am the same person at heart, with fresh memories.

beholding grandeur

It’s my last three days here. The sun went down on the 20^th about 01:56. I have been up for a sunrise this morning as it tries to ascend through the clouds. Sometimes I try to take pictures, but more recently, I have been sitting and watching. The scope of the picture is far to grand to put in a camera lens. Besides “seeing” this view, to really know and understand what it is, one must experience it. It’s a feeling of beholding the grandeur of Creation.

I contemplated this while observing the Royal Society Mountain Range. We see a range from sea level to the highest 14000 foot peak. I realized, as a cloud cover began to settle over their highness's, that in Christian faith, we often see snapshots of what it is to believe in Jesus Christ. We have a photo of what “rules” a Christian life should be lived by; maybe even a person who exemplifies this. We have a thumbnail of church liturgy, we carry a picture of Jesus on the cross in our wallet, or collage pictures of our mission work in a foreign country on our wall as our means to salvation. But, then we miss the big picture sometimes. Sometimes (and for me, I mean most times) we focus so much on the details; the individual stones or layers of earth, that we miss the awe-inspiring majesty of what God created, painfully watched fall, and gracefully rescued and rebuilds in our lives.

So, here I sit, for a moment in time, taking in a hazy unbelievable immense sunrise; the colors and scope of which cannot be described; the shadows from clouds, and precipices far too intricate to capture well on camera. And, here I also simply behold my Christian faith.

Life is made of so many pieces; art, forgiveness, work, mis-communication, deliberate injustices, hospitality, friendship, commitment…my list could go on and on. In high school I took a personality test where the results defined a person as global (seeing the whole picture and caring less about the details) or analytic (understanding and seeking to maintain the individual parts of a project). I was diagnosed as an analytic, but I always wanted to be global. I bring up this illustration, because in life, as in faith, these elements are not mutual exclusive. Strong well-laid bricks will make an impenetrable castle.

Taking this illustration a step further, I have seen a pronunciation of relativistic worldviews regarding faith and religion while in Antarctica. Lots of people here seek “truth” by accepting all forms of deity. This diversity of understanding "truth" has been the most frustrating part of being here. Rather than deliberately placing bricks to build a strong tower, I have witnesses a degradation of many world belief systems; where bricks are chosen from a variety of traditions and merely thrown in a pile of what looks and feels good in the moment. There is a loss of Truth, an apathy towards salvation, and a focus on “self,” rather than God and others.

I don't have all the answers and people on The Ice can tell you I have messed up and mis-communicated plenty; but I have found Truth. Some would argue I have found a faith that “works for me” or fulfills my needs, but that simply makes faith out to be a self-serving feeling.

I have faith that was passed down from my parents and grandparents for generations, based on the Truth that is found in the Bible which is a document, remarkably written in a consistent fashion by multiple authors over many years. This piece of spiritual literature is The Word of God. Its’ focus is not on me, myself, and I. It’s about a Creator and Redeemer. It’s about God reconciling humanity falling to a sinful world; about a God who had compassion on a people-gone-wrong and wanting to still save them. It’s about God sending part of himself in the form of His human Son to carry the burden of all people’s wrongness and suffer a death so that those who accept this amazing sacrifice will not die, but live in a place with God, the Creator of all good things.

After that, there are no issues comparable. They are perhaps analytically important (the rock and soil creating the mountains), but they have so little to do with the broad gratitude and joy and humble service we should be lifting towards God.

So, if we focus on compiling bricks we risk missing the larger castle construction. When we concentrate so hard on what the hills are made of, we don’t behold the mountain view; the amazing Truth, right in front of us.

thinking time

I finally found a place to be alone! Of course, it has to be a warm day and requires quite a walk or jog; and there are occasional hikers who pass by. However, this is the most quiet peace I have had in some time. The path I took winds around Ob Hill. I started out running, but the trail is quite precarious in spots and I took to walking chunks of it as well.

On one side, the wind was blocked and there was quiet. I stood there and watched a plane come in for landing at Willie Field and saw the Terra Bus slowly creeping the 7 miles over the ice shelf back to town. I ran further; down the back, sea-side, of the hill and came across a bone yard where skuas must indulge in their penguin and seal findings of the day. Yet further along the trail, I found a variety of different rocks that make up the hill.

I sat down on some scree and enjoyed the warm (40F+) temperatures and the gentle breeze. And, there, I thought. I thought about how vast the ice was and how temporal some of it is as the ice breakers took turns combating a gigantic chunk of the frozen water that decided to block in the ice pier today. I thought about how magnificent the mountains across the sea were and how small I am; crouched on the side of a little hill on a little island in a huge sea on a humongous continent in a bigger world.

I used to think I had little testimony of life to share with people; and perhaps my life does not contain the wild adventure and hilarious stories of some. I might not have the most comedic or interesting personality, or standout in drastic proportions to others, but as I finished college and went on with life on my own, I realized that not only do I have an explanation for the way my life has come and gone, but so does everyone else. My life's testimony does not culminate in my Antarctic existence, it has more to do with the journey I took to get here. This icy adventure may become part of my life testimony as I process through the rest of life; but it is not an end; nor a beginning to what I live for. All of life is a learning process. The people I have met in the last 3 months have taught me things to take along with me into the next part of my life's purpose.

Every day I reflect on how special it is to be here, in Antarctica in 2007. I am floored in amazement that God actually created some vistas and buttes, mountains and seas for me; for us to enjoy. So, on the hillside, I sent back some joy. But, while these things are building blocks to the next segment of life, my life’s testimony up to this point is what is important. It is my love for throwing javelin, my endearment to friends and family, my tough years working and trying to find out what to do, my interest in other people, my desire to find truth, and my strong will to travel; and more importantly how Christ has influenced me in each of those parts of life; redeeming my life and those around me. While I have had my ups and downs, I am unraveling (slowly and incompletely) why God has me on earth.

Right now I'm not accomplishing huge feats for mankind like some of the scientists here. I'm not a missionary; or even able to attend church every Sunday. I'm not doing something I am particularly "gifted" at. But, I am able to praise God for every blessing, here. I believe in the cause I am supporting as a caretaker of Creation. I am learning about society in a micro-community and finding all sorts of people who have as many ways of interpreting our existence. I am seeing new and exciting things and hoping for a renewal of Creation. I guess, my testimony is not something I focus on or emphasize; it is the way I live my life and the process of life that I continue to be a part of.

"Take these hands and lift them up. For I have not the strength to praise you near enough. Take my voice and pour it out. Let it sing the songs of mercy I have found. Take my body and build it up. May it be broken as an offering of love. Take my time from this earth and let it glorify all that you are worth. All my soul needs is all your love to cover me; so all the world may see I have nothing without You." - Bebo Norman -

creating confusion and future finaglings

I've come up with some analogies to life lately based on my experiences here.

One is that my head can be a lot like a bad game of pool. A couple of days ago, I racked the balls and took about 15 shots at them. Not one ball found its' way to the pockets (well, except the cue ball). I kind of feel like that is how I'm thinking about my travel plans and life right now. I have lots of thoughts banging around in my head up there, but none have put themselves away yet.

Then, life is also like the transition between land and sea that I drive through to get out to our Willie Field and Pegasus airports. There are some huge lakes in the ice (bigger than the picture I am posting). They are actually puddles, but the bottom is not visible. This is disconcerting; considering we drive over the Ross Sea. So, when driving through these puddles, we can either stop, or plow through. A drivers initial reaction is to stop before arriving at the puddle, but we can't make our journey if we stop for apparent danger. The next thought is to drive real slow in case something happens, but that may leave the vehicle stranded at the bottom of the puddle. So, the third option is to proceed with caution through the obstacle and keep up the momentum to push out of it. I guess that is how I ended up in Antarctica. I saw an opportunity that was scary and proceeded with caution and have been plowing through it hoping to exit this place with momentum to keep living life with the energy and faith I found in this cold place.

So, with that being said, I intend to give you an idea of what my general, unplanned idea is for the next few months:

February 24: My redeployment date. This is the date I am scheduled to leave Antarctica. If weather is bad, or there are mechanical issues, our plane will be delayed. The season could also be extended as late as March 3 and since I am scheduled on the last flight out, I will stay if they decide we need to stretch summer in McMurdo an extra week.

Because we could end up leaving Antarctica as late as March, I cannot make plans to leave New Zealand until then. I do intend to spend two to three weeks in New Zealand. I will be flying out with friends who I hope to travel with on the South Island for awhile before heading to Auckland to explore New Zealand's North Island with my Kiwi friends, Kirrin and Jeremy, who live there.

After my time in New Zealand, I will be headed to Sydney, Australia. I intend to spend a couple days in the city and then getting out for a couple weeks in the southeastern side of the continent. This should put me into the first week of April.

From Sydney, I will board another plane to Honolulu to spend 2-3 days in Hawaii. I cannot say I am particularly excited about making a trip there, but if I'm headed over the islands anyway, I may as well tick that difficult state off the list of 50. Sydney and Honolulu come at a grand total with visa fees and taxes to $270NZ (which should be around $190USD). I can't beat that!

After a short stint in Hawaii, I will complete my travels and return to O'Hare. Back in the Chicago area, I hope to catch up with friends, sort through my belongings, take care of taxes, and attend a wedding in honor of Lexi and Matt.

With the intention of returning to The Ice next year, I will be relocating to Washington State this summer and hopefully finding a job there as well. This entire grand plan will be completed by May, although, dates and times remain to be determined.

So, if you know of anyone who has some extra space to transport a few boxes from Illinois to Washington, let me know. Or, if you know of anyone who needs a summer employee on the west coast, drop me a line!

midnight madness

New Years brought McMurdo another two day weekend. I cannot begin to tell you how nice it is to recuperate for more than 24 hours. This week will also begin our third (and last) shuttles rotation. The first, was my 17:30 to 05:30 shift. I am finishing my 05:30 to 17:30 rotation and moving into a 06:30 to 18:30 schedule.

But beyond the functionality of our work schedule, a large number of activities are scheduled to entertain us over the holiday weekend. There was a toga party, a fuel tanker party, two morning brunches in a row, Icestock, a Hut 10 Christmas party for our shuttles crew and another New Years party at Scott Base.

My Old Years Day was consumed by activities. I found myself out at Icestock early. This peculiar Antarctic event is held outside (I panorama-ed some pictures together) and features bands from around station, a chili cook-off, and some fabulous “art.” Of course, my favorite part had to be the Sawbucks; appropriately staffed by the carpentry shop. I enjoyed a nice cup of free coffee in a real Starbucks cup with Erik (he’s a general assistant, GA, and one of the very first people I met in my hotel in Denver).

I went for a run to Scott Base, but only made it to the top of their hill before I had to turn back because of wind and dust. I have to say, it was one of the most miserable runs ever! I was grateful for my balaclava to save me from inhaling the volcanic dust, but it did not keep me from getting blown across the road as I ran back into town! Last night the storm finally made its’ way into McMurdo. We had a nice fresh thin layer of snow this morning when it was over. I noticed today, we are getting some more flurries. After living such a dusty, muddy existence for the last few weeks, the new snow is a welcome sight!

For New Years, our shuttles crew had our Christmas party with gift exchange. Kris (our supervisor) and Megan (night senior) whipped up a delicious Greek feast for us all and we had a gift exchange. Then we had movies, games, and a midnight champagne toast. The festivities were quiet, but that is how I usually celebrate the turn of the year.

So, it is a new year; a fresh start to an ambiguously marked time, or year, in history. A lot will change for me in the next months to the end of next year. I will see many new places and hope for new faces, too! I have neglected to determine any resolutions, although, I hope to exercise more consistently. I wouldn’t know where to start with a resolution for an unplanned future. I am determined to have a great deal of faith in God’s provision, and a few unique adventures in the coming year!

“Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault. All glory to him who alone is God, our Savior through Jesus Christ our Lord. All glory, majesty, power, and authority are his before all time, and in the present, and beyond all time! Amen.” – Jude 1:24-25 -

realizing reality

I try to write my blog entries about the fun, exciting, and good things that happen here, but sometimes things don’t go so well, either. I wrote this before Christmas, but it seemed like too much of a downer for the holiday. Life still has it’s dull moments and frustrations on this fascinating continent.

This morning, I woke up with a sore throat and I felt pretty tired. I have what we call “The Crud.” It is a generic term for any sort of cold or sickness. Being sick here is never healthy for anyone because we are always using the same facilities. Our housing and dining crews aggressively clean common areas to give us the best shot at staying healthy while we are here.

Then there are things going on around station like the norovirus which is highly contagious. If you catch it, you are promptly quarantined. It comes from an outbreak in Christchurch. That disease certainly prompts one to stay away from folks arriving from New Zealand!

I’ve also lost some new friends two days ago. The first rotation of Kiwi Cargo left for New Zealand and with them, was my new friend, Kirrin. I do hope to see her in Auckland when I return. One of our shuttles drivers, Rick, is also headed home after the New Year. It is sad to watch people leave when I just started to know them!

This morning on Willie Field Taxi, I was around for the medevac flight of a 74 year old Swedish woman who broke a femur about a cruiseship. She was helo-ed to McMurdo and put on a flight to New Zealand. However, this flight didn’t get off the ground due to another medivac who needed to fly north today, as well. So, as I write this in my van, the crew I am picking up is assisting in loading her back into the ambulance to McMurdo. They will try again later today with two medivacs. Getting hurt while in Antarctica can pose some big logistics issues. The estimated cost of the Swedish woman’s medivac was in the range of $150k US.

And, every time we see a cute little penguin, or some of the slithering seal, we usually have to remind ourself that these poor little creatures have wandered too far from home. While they make for good pictures, the penguins are usually sick or disoriented. The seal we saw out at Willie Field was quite a distance from any open water. It's fascinating to understand the cycle of life and death as it works in front of our face down here. But, it still makes me want to help these creatures find their home again!

Don't get me wrong, I'm having a fabulous time in Antarctica. But, sometimes there is a bluntly honest and real part of life that deserves to be reported as well!

cheer

Going into work today put me in the Christmas spirit of helping others. I arrived at work and immediately was assigned to help in the mail room, sorting the boxes and cards and letters that came in on the C-17 from New Zealand yesterday. I happily sorted through the letters and found 3 Christmas cards addressed to me! All this mail was the last shipment of goodies to make it here before the holiday.

After I helped out in the mail room, I tromped over to the galley to spend a few hours helping out with holiday preparations. I fully expected to wash pots, or chop onions, but instead, I helped unload the cheese into the fridge, and then decorated cookies with Tia.

Laura also arrived back to McMurdo today. I had a hunch she was on a flight that J picked up, and I told him to pass her off to me at Willie Field, so I could drive her back to town (now that the runway has moved, it's a 1/2 hour ride back to the station.

The holidays are nearly here. (Shuttle "Tex" even got this AC Adapter powered traveling lighted Christmas tree from his mom - too bad it doesn't get dark here)! Today at the store, the bubbly beverages sold out before I went to dinner. I got my bottle of wine to contribute for Christmas dinner!

As you prepare for your celebration:

"Listen! It’s the voice of someone shouting, “Clear the way through the wilderness
for the Lord! Make a straight highway through the wasteland for our God! Fill in the valleys,
and level the mountains and hills. Straighten the curves, and smooth out the rough places. Then the glory of the Lord will be revealed, and all people will see the salvation sent from God. The Lord has spoken!” - Isaiah 40:3-5 -

coming christmas

Christmas is coming! And, even though I am not around as many practicing Christian friends, the Christmas season has a much more authentic feel to me this year. There are a few decorations around town and colored lights went up in our suite yesterday (and I thought the colorful road flags were rather Christmasy, too), but we don’t experience the panicked hustle and bustle of holiday shopping and obsessive decorating. So, if anything comes close to the insanity of Christmas shopping it was a couple weeks ago when the line at the store was 5 deep and people packed up their gifts to send home before the mail deadline at the post office. Instead, we make do with what we have and look forward to our station Christmas dinner at which we will see such delicacies as duck and lobster!

Yesterday I saw the perfect 6 pointed snowflake land on the front window of the Terra Bus. It stayed for over a minute, frozen in it's glittery state until it blew off. I wish I had my camera to capture the amazing beauty of that ice; so small, but it is now just a sweetened memory (instead, I'll just attach one of the pictures from the pressure ridge tour I took last week). Given our inevitable white Christmas, what do we dream of down here? Well:

I remember the Christmas’ past when the extended family would get together in one house for three days and talk, play games, eat, and eat, and eat some more. Those Christmas' were simpler in my understanding of the place we live. Peace stood a chance because I didn’t understand the complications of war; or how entangled human civilization can become.

I have hopes for Christmas’ to come of our Prince of Peace to come again and make everything new. I hope for peace and a world without sin. I dream of the day when life is not so complicated and the right decisions are made for me. I hope for a Christmas with family again; when we can crowd in a room and thank God for His Son together; and then celebrate our gratitude for our food and company. After all that, I suppose I would hope for something other than pumpkin or pecan pie for dessert.

I anticipate a Christmas this year with new friends and with Laura, flying in from the South Pole. I will have a grand meal to indulge in with a glass of wine and plentiful conversation. I know I'll get my "something other than pumpkin or pecan pie for dessert." And, I'll have the memories to keep near of family and friends back home who will celebrate their holiday in similar fashion.

I know one thing remains the same from Christmas to Christmas: The reason we can celebrate and share the joy of this holiday is because God’s Son was sent to us to make the world new and to prepare a way for us to meet Him when he returns.

“I’m here with the others who saw the heavens testify. Now I hang back in the shadows, I want to come close. I want to know. She sees me shivering here, she smiles and with a nod, I walk through the mud and straw to the newborn Son of God. He raises a wrinkled hand through the dust and the flies. Wrapped in rags like we are and with barely open eyes, he takes my finger and He won’t let go and He won’t let go! It’s nothing like I knew before and it’s all I need to know. Come, let us adore Him, He has come down to this barren land where we live and all I have to give Him is adoration." - Newsboys, Adoration -

For myself, this lack of a commercial Christmas makes it a little easier to live the prayer we said on Sunday: "Lord in heaven, save us from mere external religion. Forive us for the times we have forsaken You, hidden our sin, and sought to help and hope in ourselves and things of this world. Heal our hearts and make us into the people You want us to be."

Happy Holidays everyone!

antarctic andrea

Omer: "A place is inside you - like a part of your body, don't you think? Like a liver or kidney? So how could you leave it?"
Liyana: "...do you think you can get your kidney back?"
from Habibi by Naomi Shihab Nye

At the beginning of this adventure, Marty, Tia, Michael, and I talked about how to identify places we've truly "been." Marty explained that it is a place that becomes part of you; a place where we have spent enough time to run through the circuit of our personal emotions, and truly experienced life.

I now know why Laura was so excited to come back to this place, Antarctica:

When I got off the plane and looked out the door, I didn't know how I would like it on The Ice. It would be cold. It would be perpetually sunny and bright outside. It would be endless white. It would be a place to form unknown relationships with little-known people and working a strange new job, wearing awkward layers of clothing.

But, I love it! There is adventure here and spirit in places and people you wouldn't expect. It is a fascinating micro-society that I belong to where opportunity knocks almost every day by means of the lenticular clouds flowing over mountain tops and the fatamorgana crossing the horizon, or where I can hike over Sea Ice and drive around distinguished visitors.
I can understand, now why Laura wanted to come back: To see this indescribable place, reconnect with the community, and be part of the excitement of science and life on The Ice.

It has, now, become part of who I am and who I will be.

coldest, windiest, highest, driest, emptiest...

...but, don't worry, I'll be in the most densely populated area of the emptiest continent!

Training is going well so far, if not a bit tiring by the end of the day! I have met a handful of very interesting people. Four of us shuttle drivers have taken to hanging out together: Marty, Mike, Tia & myself.

One thing I found particularly interesting is that 68% of waste from Antarctica is recyclable. This number cannot even begin to be met by any U.S. city (of course, Seattle has the best recycling rate at around 40%). The waste program is specifically taught to everyone and strictly monitored by "wasties" who hand-pick through all different recyclables! Everything gets shipped back to the States (either California or Washington) on a big barge. As one woman noted on her blog, "you can't throw anything away in Antarctica because there is no 'away' to throw it to."

Today, I received a brand new pair of boots and my laptop was scanned and has a brand new sticker so it is authorized to plug in to the network through the United States Antarctic Program. I've filled out my paperwork and received my application for a 9 month visa to New Zealand!

And, grateful to my friends at Sweetener Supply, I received my external hard drive today so I don't lose my files if I lose my computer on the trip. I'm backing everything up as I write!

A sidenote: For those of you who may not know, my sister, Laura, will also be in Antarctica this year. She is in New Zealand right now, waiting for her perpetually delayed Ice Flight down to the continent. I've been mistaken for Laura a couple of times already today! Many people have noted our apparent similar looks, or quickly identify me as Laura's sister. It's strange to be following her, rather than she following me like it was all through school!

rhyme & reason

Most people who know I’m headed to the southern-most continent on the globe have asked the inevitable question, “why.” I’m somewhat embarrassed to say that I don’t have a good rational reason.

The tall-sized response is: “It’s an opportunity to have an amazing working adventure trip.”

The grande-sized answer: I suppose much of my motivation is to experience some change in my life. In 5 years, I have seen many of my family members and friends move to a variety of places from California to Massachusetts. Since visiting Matt in Cameroon, I have experienced an incessant need for travel. Watching my family and friends take opportunities to Europe, Asia, and elsewhere, while I was unable to participate, only fed the fire. Another factor is my frustration with the self-centered-ness I continue watching in western society, where the “me, me, me” attitude is demolishing the infrastructure of our cohesive “United” States. I know I have my moments of self-indulgence, as well (in fact, this might be a selfish move in itself to extract myself from the egocentric society I’ve grown tired of), but this may be a way to run away from the attention-grabbing, media-hungry breaking-news society we regularly participate in. Some may also say I am rebelling a bit against what is expected of me in terms of being a single woman in society; that I am defying the ridiculous notion that I MUST actively and continually pursue becoming a married woman with 2.5 kids, a minivan, and a house in the suburbs by age 30 (or even 35) to become “successful”. Whatever the root of the reason, I have tossed off what the world considers valuable in the means of possessions (tangible & others) and career, and forced myself to proceed on a bit of faith that God will provide what I need. In one sense, this change has nothing to do with me and my familiar comforts, and in another, it has everything to say about who I am as I step into a new adventure.

I would like to tell my Christian friends that I have poured hours of endless prayer into this decision to fly the coop and head south, but, it wasn’t like that. Yes, I prayed that God would use me in my life for His Purpose, and I pray now for who I will be, and what I will be a part of, and how I represent myself to others, but, at the point of decision, an opportunity presented itself and I took it. I do trust that God gave me this opportunity, has a purpose, and sent me the next step in His Plan in the form of an e-mail from Pete at Raytheon Polar Services. Pastor Fred told me on Sunday: “God will go with you.” I rest comfortable in that knowledge. An amazing amount of peace flooded over me with those words!

If you want the venti-sized answer, you’ll have to sit down with me for a couple hours over coffee at Starbucks and talk through dozens of life circumstances and stories. I’ll spare you those long paragraphs! But, know, that wherever this posting finds you, God is with you wherever you go, too.

ticking time

I realized today that I'm too tied to time. I have 3 weeks until I fly to Denver and a multitude of projects, purchases, packing, and such to take care of in that time. And, just when we think things are under control--when we offer God our plans with open hands, sometimes he takes them and shakes them up, or throws them out. In my case, he added another event to the list: I'm driving out to South Dakota tomorrow to be with my family at the funeral of my Grandma. In the midst of the Antarctic mayhem, this trip, although long, will be a break in the frenzy. It will allow some time for packages to arrive in Illinois, and a bit more planning time before my possessions get boxed up or shipped out. And, it will give me some quiet reflection time to see God's creation and enjoy the people he has put in my book of life (whether they are there for a long chapter like Grandma, or a brief page, or two).

the closing of a chapter

Sometimes I like to think of life like a book. Except, all my chapters overlap. Yesterday, a chapter I've been living my whole life came to an end. My grandma died last night. She was the grandma who I thought would live for ever. And she did; well, she lived to 94. I didn't get to see her often, but I've looked up to what I interpret as a determined and strong-willed spirit in her. She made up her mind and that was what she did. She took care of herself after my grandpa passed away and looked after folks her age at the rest home. She lived independently until only a couple years ago.

My childhood memories go back to how much she loved being a grandma--so much that she handed us grandkids $1 bills at family reunions. Her T.V. never had real great reception, but her house provided a generous back yard for playing tag, firey tiger lilies that bloomed in the summer, a propane tank I always imagined being a big fat pig that sort of landed smack dab in the middle of the yard, and a creaky attic with all sorts of fantastic dolls, clothes and knick-knacks from the past (like my mom's old toys and dresses). I remember Dad, Matt, and I rolled the biggest snowball ever in her yard one winter. I played with paper dolls at her kitchen table and tasted Sioux Bee spun honey for the first time at her house.

With her passing, I've also been left grand-parentless. I've only ever known my grandmothers and hoped one day they would both be able to be at my wedding. But, some opportunities in life are not afforded to everyone. I feel a bit as if some wisdom I could have accessed and used later in life has walked away. But now my grandparents are wise beyond what our minds can comprehend. They are celebrating a far more great cause than any of my celebrations on earth. They have seen their Savior.

what if...

"There is an evil I have seen under the sun, the sort of error that arises from a ruler: Fools are put in many high positions, while the rich occupy the low ones. I have seen slaves on horseback, while princes go on foot like slaves.
Whoever digs a pit may fall into it; whoever breaks through a wall may be bitten by a snake, whoever quarries stones may be injured by them; whoever splits logs may be endangered by them."

-Ecclesiastes 10: 5-9-

There are a great number of things that people fear in life. I think many of us could add things, or modernize this list from Ecclesiastes: Whoever makes use of air travel may plummet to the earth; whoever eats sushi may become ill; whoever uses anti-bacterial products may prevent their bodies from fighting diseases later in life; whoever sits by a lake in the evening may get West Nile Virus from a mosquito...

John Ortberg has a great illustration in his book, If You Want to Walk on Water, You've Got to Get Out of the Boat: "Usually maternal advice runs along the lines of Be Careful. You could get hurt. Don't play with that stick - you could poke out someone's eye. In all your life, have you ever known anybody who lost an eye playing with sticks?"

If you don't take risks, you also do not take in the rewards. Life has a 100% mortality rate. And, all the while we fear death, it will take hold of us one day. If we don't fly, we also don't get to travel and see God's Creation. If we sanitize ourselves silly, we may end up suseptible to a miserable disease our body cannot attack. So, I'm letting go and getting out of the boat. I'm going to try walking on water. All the while, I know that people (even leaders and rulers) will fail me, I could end up unemployed when I come back from Antarctica for longer than I want, I could freeze to death in an ice storm, I could fail miserably at this job, or the next, but without risk, I will not find treasure in this life, or what follows.

My life is meaningless and lost completely if I leave it to myself to figure out. But, if I believe and have faith that Christ has redeemed me by his death, then I have purpose in serving him no matter where I am.

"No one knows what is coming - who can tell him what will happen after him?" Ecclesiastes 10:15

the ice

Ant·arc·ti·ca (ant-ärk'ti-ka, -är'ti-)

A continent lying chiefly within the Antarctic Circle and asymmetrically centered on the South Pole. Some 95 percent of Antarctica is covered by an icecap averaging 1.6 km (1 mi) in thickness. The region was first explored in the early 1800s, and although there are no permanent settlements, many countries have made territorial claims. The Antarctic Treaty of 1959, signed by 12 nations, prohibited military operations on the continent and provided for the interchange of scientific data. (dictionary.com)

(picture of Mt. Erebus by my dear sister, Laura)

a.k.a. The Ice. I am going to there. I am headed to the coldest continent on earth, the most uninhabited, southern-most land-mass on the globe!

On October 4, I will be in Denver, Colorado for training and fly to Christchurch, New Zealand. From there, on October 10, I am set to deploy on a cargo plane to Antarctica! I'll be living at McMurdo Station, a town of 1000, or so during the austral summer (October through February). My position there will be as a Vehicle Operator, ie. shuttle bus driver. The picture posted here will give you an indication of what type of vehicle I'll be operating.

A million things are flying through my head right now. I have a little more than a month to prepare for this adventure; to pack up my belongings, finish projects, give my notice at work, store my car, and push off to this desolate continent under the ozone hole. Yikes!! Keep me in your prayers while I prepare!

If you want some more information on this great space, check out the following websites!
https://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/geos/ay.html
http://plasma.nationalgeographic.com/places/continents/continent_antarctica.html

tune-ing into life

Music has a significant role in my life. Sometimes I use it to mimic my emotions and feelings of anger, apathy, delight, or excitement. Sometimes I use it to relax, or soothe me. Sometimes I find myself taking it in to stimulate and motivate me. Sometimes music captures me and turns my attitude toward its' melodies. Sometimes it prompts me, or helps me worship God. In fact, just this evening I ran by a house where music was flowing out of the garage and I could sync my steps to the beat.

I recently ran across an amazingly "happy" group called Te Vaka. I downloaded the equivalent to an entire CD of their music (from a phenomenal website for world music called, calabashmusic.com) because it encourages me to find joy in their music and in the world. This group is of New Zealand, but captures the spunk and soul of a variety of Samoan and Pacific Islands. It is my new "sunny" music."

un-ugly october

When I was young, I resented having a birthday in October. The month carried a sense of lifelessness; probably most apparent when I flipped to the month in any calendar. October, inevitably, has the most ugly picture of the 12 months.

For quite some time I day-dreamed about having my birthday on the colorful calendar pages of June, or under the snowpacked mountains of January. But, apparently, as I soon learned, you cannot will the month of your birthday to change; like you can't move the hands of a clock forward to make time go faster (I tried that, too, when I was about 5 and wanted to watch Mr. Rogers at 4:45, rather than at 5pm). So, I was stuck with ugly October.

My only consolation for awhile was that I had many friends who were also born in the ugly month. I appreciated my company!

As in all of life, there is a redemptive end to this story. I enjoy October now. It's the middle of autumn. When I was younger, I was not so aware of the seasonal changes, whereas now, October is a time of year where the air and the trees sigh with relief from the summer heat. There is change lingering in sky as cooler air removes the stagnant gunk of summer. I like the smells of fresh (almost frosty) morning air with a hint of dry leaves, the changing colors of the deciduous trees, and sometimes seeing my breath when I'm out running.

While the calendar pages typically remain the most mundane of the year, un-ugly october is now one of my favorite times of the year and a fantastic month for a birthday; the changing of seasons for the changing of years.